Poolside Percy

Dirty, crowded (London Swim School night, bless 'em). I'm not gonna have anything positive to say, my own fault for going there. First signs of snow on the way home. 64 lengths.

Tuesday night post work swim. I forgot about the recent heroics, I just wanted to get wet and have a swim. Swam 32 can't really be bothered lengths. I find this pool very uninspiring, I can't find any more interesting photos either. I really need to go a little bit further afield and find some new pools to swim in. Cheap/free swims: splashpath.com Photo to be verified by lawyers.

Late Sunday morning swim. Stopped off at the Speedo shop on Neal shop in Covent Garden for a new pair of goggles. Goodbye leaky Zoggs. Beautiful, sunny morning. I love the West End. I live in London, I was born in London, you can bury me in London. I still love the vibe, well the one before all the tourists come out to play. Swimming. Sometimes it all just comes together. Hardly any other bodies in the pool. My new relaxed and lazy, languid style seems to be quite effective. Managed to swim the first 40 lengths in a credible time without the panting, splash and rush. Cruised to 60 lengths. Headed off to Camden Town to watch War Horse with DW/DD and the Jacksons. Photo: Harry Fowler and Joan Collins (I Believe in You)

Madness. Decided to swim 2 miles (106 lengths of the Willies pool). Job done. Shame the place was so busy on a Sunday afternoon.

Finchley Lido early 90s This place depresses me. I've said it all before. Poor customer service, filthy changing rooms, dirty pools of water on the floor. The locals obviously don't care about my whinging, place was packed. That's why they shut at 4pm on a Saturday because the place is full of people having fun. Crazy, crazy, crazy. Anyway, had a good swim, fire alarm went off on length 61 of 64, very annoying. Photo: by Graham Hobbs

Was out buying trainers with DW in Camden so popped in for a swim. Swam an obtuse and languid mile. I think I need to stretch more to free the mind. I've been swimming diagonally from one corner of the pool to the other on my final length. Not managed to piss anyone off yet. Pissing with rain when I came out.

Results from last night's glittering awards ceremony: best swim ever - Parliament Hill Lido 10/09/11 best pool in the world - Piscina Municipal de Montjuïc, Barcelona longest swim - 3KM, Prince of Wales Baths best wild swim - Uldecona Reservoir, Spain best old skool pool - Acton Baths notable achievement award - River Ouse, Barcombe Mills worst pool - Finchley Lido

Haunts of the Black Masseur First 'proper' swim of the new year. Swam an obligatory mile. I've been reading 'Haunts of the Black Masseur - the swimmer as fool hero', more to follow.

Saltdean Beach The languid finger of fate found me in Lewes on New years day so it seemed rude not to join the Saltdean Sea Swimmers Club for their annual dip. Arrived just in time to join the throng. With so many spectators there was was no hanging about it was straight in. I can't say I really swam, just jumped about. Lots of wetsuits, one of them told me I was mad. Isn't it just different degrees of madness at this end of the madness beach? Stayed in for a few minutes at most. I lost my ring, who cares, I had a great time. Happy new year.